Turkey is a quintessential part of many holiday feasts and family gatherings. However, this ubiquitous poultry dish is also the subject of a rather unflattering quip “turkey tastes like napkins.” Where did this comparison originate and is there any truth to this belief? Let’s unravel the mysteries behind this fowl legend.
The Origins of the Infamous “Turkey Tastes Like Napkins” Maxim
It’s unclear precisely when or how the saying “turkey tastes like napkins” first came about Some posit it emerged in the early 20th century as a reaction to the mass commercialization of turkey farming With turkeys being quickly raised to meet high holiday demands, the end product was often of inferior quality and taste.
The phrase gained further prominence after appearing in pop culture. In 1975, the comedic song “The Thanksgiving Turkey” by musical satirists Stan Freberg and Daws Butler compared the bird to “a wet paper bag.” In 1992, the comedy film “Home Alone 2” made a “turkey tastes like napkins” joke.
However, the advent of the internet cemented this catchphrase into the zeitgeist. It became a popular quip on forums, social media, and meme culture. Though its origins are murky, clearly this pithy phrase resonated with many turkey detractors.
Examining the Potential Factors Behind This Perception
How could noble poultry provoke such a harsh indictment? There are several factors that may explain why someone could perceive a turkey as napkin-esque:
Overcooking – The cardinal sin of preparing turkey is overcooking the bird. Extended high heat roasting robs turkey of moisture, creating an unappetizing dry, stringy texture.
Lack of Flavor – Modern commercial turkeys are bred for size over taste. Without rich flavors from herbs, spices, brines or rubs, turkey can register as bland.
Preparation Methods – Frying, smoking, spatchcocking and other techniques can imbue turkey with more juiciness and taste. Basic roasting alone won’t maximize flavor.
Side Dishes – Turkey served alone, without savory sauces or sides to balance its mildness, puts its shortcomings center stage.
Personal Preference – Some simply don’t care for poultry, finding it dry or boring compared to red meat. Turkey’s neutral taste profile may underwhelm strong flavor enthusiasts.
Cognitive Biases – Pejorative phrases can shape perceptions. If one expects turkey to mirror napkins, that notion may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Evaluating the Validity of the “Turkey = Napkins” Claim
However, is this scathing napkin analogy warranted? A sober evaluation finds the notion lacks legitimate merits.
When properly prepared, turkey can deliver a satisfying mélange of textures and savory umami. Brining, spicing, injecting, and gentle roasting allows turkey to achieve its delicious potential. Served with traditional tangy, salty, and herbal accompaniments, it’s clearly no tasteless tablecloth.
Of course, preferences are subjective. Yet conflating the entire turkey species with an office supply seems rather extreme. With over 9 billion consumed annually in the US alone, turkey has delighted far more palates than it has offended.
Embracing Turkey in All its Savory Glory
Rather than resign oneself to the napkin cliché, we encourage giving turkey another chance. With the right prep, cookery and pairings, you may discover a mouthwatering dish worthy of the most festive occasions.
We recommend utilizing online recipes, videos and turkey-loving communities to master this maligned bird. Lean into time-tested touches like brines, rubs and injections to amplify flavor. And remember, gentler cooking preserves moisture, while side dishes provide balance.
This Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s, serve turkey with renewed confidence, zeal and optimism. Properly prepared, perhaps you’ll find yourself contradicting folk wisdom, and declaring “this turkey tastes nothing like napkins!”
So let’s bid goodbye to this stale catchphrase and usher in a new age of turkey appreciation. With an open mind and some culinary know-how, we may discover that when done right, turkey tastes not like paper products, but like absolute perfection.
